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Thread Box:
"YOU ARE NOT A CAR!"
Thread started by dannyzuko at 07.17.08 - 9:28 am

YOU ARE NOT A CAR!

That's what Officer Collier from the Long Beach Police Department told me after pulling a small group of us over at the intersection of Los Coyotes and Clark in Long Beach last night at 8:30 p.m. We were heading downtown via Los Coyotes a three lane street that runs diagonal through East Long Beach. We were in the far left tuning lane 50 feet from the actual intersection, when we were pulled over. He then instructed us to go to the far right, crossing three traffic lanes with oncoming traffic, very unsafe, cause there were cars coming our direction, I stood there for a minute dumbfounded at what he was asking us to do, I yelled out to him "it's not safe!" He got a little agitated I could tell in his outside voice on the speaker, he kept repeating "pull over to the right, the far right," We crossed the three lanes and then he came out and gave me the "you are not a car," by then office Brown pulled up right behind and came out and just observed, Officer Collier then said to me something along the lines of "I don't want you to get hit and killed." And "I could give you a ticket." He then told me when you come to an intersection when you need to make a left, you need to cross the intersection like a pedestrian stop then cross the intersection again and he instructed us to do it and stayed there and watched us. Officer Collier was driving a huge Suburban police car so that would make him something like a Sgt or Commander, I'll find out since I'll be filling a report against him, Not Officer Brown, he was cool.

reply


that's right, i am not a car.



soso
07.17.08 - 9:36 am

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View Larger Map
this might explain things a bit, no I am not A CAR! But thank you for pointing that out to me, all these years I questioned myself.



dannyzuko
07.17.08 - 9:48 am

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yeah he had a point because you're definitely not a car. and when is the next time you'll legally get to go from the far left to the far right? he's trying to make the ride more exciting!



neverclever
07.17.08 - 9:48 am

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Clueless. Of course you're not. Should have replied, "I'm not a car. I'm a cyborg. My CPU is a neural net processor, a learning computer. The more contact I have with humans, the more I learn." then start doing the robot.



DetroitRider
07.17.08 - 9:51 am

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We're not cars...but we're supposed to follow the same rules:



I hope my link works right...if not:

http://www.dmv.ca.gov/pubs/hdbk/pgs55thru57.htm#bike



adrian
07.17.08 - 9:52 am

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I had to bite my touge, I wanted to tell him off but I had my 14 y/o son with me.

on a side note, this area is patrolled by this station right here,
across the street is none other than a kispy creame, im not kidding,

View Larger Map



dannyzuko
07.17.08 - 10:06 am

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Just out of curiosity, does the city of LB have any municipal codes that over ride the cvc? I'm sure you know best, but it could be possible that there are some different rules for bicycles. Like the riding/no riding on sidewalks in Weho/Santa Monica.






stevo4
07.17.08 - 10:10 am

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Cops not knowing the rules. No surprise there.
Sometimes if works to your advantage though. Like if you forget your front light at night or something and a cop wont even think about pulling you over.



Lizzard
07.17.08 - 10:10 am

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I think some cops can appreciate a smart ass attitude as long as you're not just being cocky. If you say something smart ass, the next comment should be, "I'm just following the civil code that says I have the right to turn left here with a hand signal. And right after we turn, I'll return to the furthest to the left I can safely ride. I appreciate your concern though."

Sorry to hear about your run in. Glad you didn't get a ticket and then have to go spend time getting it overturned.



DetroitRider
07.17.08 - 10:13 am

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this was filmed in LB, and not that I'm aware of Stevo,





dannyzuko
07.17.08 - 10:23 am

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I like when officers enforce laws that they learn about via anecdotal evidence.

"One time I saw a guy make a left turn using the crosswalk, so it MUST be true.!!"

Fools need to read the CVC!



kyber
07.17.08 - 10:27 am

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^KHAKI RIDAZZ



Purp
07.17.08 - 11:37 am

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GUYS! GUYS! What a wonderful T-Shirt this would make though:

"I AM NOT A CAR."
yes?
no?
maybe?



soso
07.17.08 - 11:45 am

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spooks tallbike ticket would be a better shirt.



ruinedbyidiots
07.17.08 - 11:46 am

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woah... I actually love that t-shirt idea



Undercover Bob
07.17.08 - 11:47 am

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see? see?!

irony: it never gets old.



soso
07.17.08 - 11:50 am

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does the LBC have any type of bike Coalition? When I get trouble from the fuzz I always start with emailing the La bike coalition about my troubles, They are always a help.





thegodofthor
07.17.08 - 11:53 am

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The more I hear about these things, the more I wonder if the pshrinks they use in law-enforcement pre-hires are even worth a damn.
I think as you can all tell by now, ignorant LEO's and psychiatrists are part of my, "Useless Resources" list.



bentstrider
07.17.08 - 12:20 pm

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I'm having those t-shirts made and I'll distribute them at cost $6 ea.



dannyzuko
07.17.08 - 12:21 pm

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Clueless. Of course you're not. Should have replied, "I'm not a car. I'm a cyborg. My CPU is a neural net processor, a learning computer. The more contact I have with humans, the more I learn." then start doing the robot.

DetroitRider
07.17.08 - 12:51 pm

HAAA!!! do the robot!!! this is the best advice any MR forum participant has ever offered!
You get scoops for a lifetime! FUCKING AWESOME!!!



meandmybluebike
07.17.08 - 12:43 pm

reply


@dannyzuko

WANT!!!



Undercover Bob
07.17.08 - 12:48 pm

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^ +1



yo delicious
07.17.08 - 12:53 pm

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it's important to be calm and courteous but to stand up for your rights. a lot of police officers that I talk to simply don't know that it's the law that you ride as a vehicle. many times the cops are from out of the area suburban type cities (simi valley, riverside etc) that dont have a lot of bicycle traffic and just arent used to bicycles being part of traffic. you had every right to be in the street.

I think we need to make some spoke cards with the cvc on it.



Roadblock
07.17.08 - 1:02 pm

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de nalga danny ;)



soso
07.17.08 - 1:05 pm

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dude, that cop is a retard.. how the fuck does he not know the rules of the road..... now a days they let anybody be a cop... what happened did they lower their standards for joining the force... dude i'm glad your reporting this....



thefrenchconn
07.17.08 - 1:08 pm

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We were pulled over by a Sargent in a Suburban, not a rookie, and im my report to the IA I requested they educate officers on the CVC.



dannyzuko
07.17.08 - 1:26 pm

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Bummer you got hassled by the LB fuzz Danny. The sad part is now this officer and others there are going to think this is the procedure for cyclist. So we can look forward to other clueless officers hassling us in LB. I know you had your son with you, but still what may have been a better option was to tell the guy, "look, if I did something wrong, then cit me for it." Yeah you would have had to take the time to go to court, but you would have educated one or more of the officers and saved countless others some hassles.

Dude I never noticed those blinking arrows on the streets before!! I'm going back to find them!!



User1
07.17.08 - 1:27 pm

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Oh yeah, I forgot to comment on the donut shop across the street from police HQ.

LOL funnier than shit, I seen it before but never put two and two together. That's worth taking a picture of and sending it to LATimes for that one section, forgot the name of the section, but you know what I'm talking about.



User1
07.17.08 - 1:31 pm

reply


I'm not?!!?!?!?

then why the fuck do i have so much gas??? shit. i think i'll just run into a real car and end it that way.

*hangs head low*



Jazzy Phat Nastee
07.17.08 - 1:48 pm

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Woooo! Scoops for life!!! Lovely parting gifts!!!!

Midnight Ridazz: The best game show that doesn't exist.

I'm sure it sucked dealing with that, killing the vibe and all. Maybe ask the police officer to hop on your bike and ask him to demonstrate what he wants you to do, then take a photo of him looking all goofy trying to ride a bike. Get the whole crowd cheering for him and befriend him too. I think a lot of the animosity we deal with is from people who have just forgotten the innocence and simple fun from pedaling a bike. The more people you can get on a bike the better so they can relate.



DetroitRider
07.17.08 - 2:12 pm

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"YOU ARE NOT A CAR" fuck, how I hate that statement and the mentality behind it! It just seems to epitomize all that's wrong with everything; aside from their ignorance of the vehicle code, the person is too lazy to even say, "You are not driving a car". Do they think cars drive themselves?

I want to say to people in cars, "You are not a car; you are a human being at the controls of a motor vehicle, but remember: you are still human!"

Put me down for a couple of those shirts, seriously . . .



mr rollers
07.17.08 - 2:20 pm

reply


Sometimes I actually wonder if anyone up here has legs at all.
I mean, 90% of the time, all you see is a torso.



bentstrider
07.17.08 - 2:29 pm

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Long Beach PD - Call 562-435-6711 and speak to Sgt. Hooker.



SoapBoxLA
07.17.08 - 2:52 pm

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DO IT!



Undercover Bob
07.17.08 - 3:01 pm

reply


I AM NOT A CAR!

I AM A MIDNIGHT RIDA!!!





Joe Borfo
07.17.08 - 3:21 pm

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RIDE ON!





Joe Borfo
07.17.08 - 3:25 pm

reply


"Sgt. Hooker"

Awesome! That's funny on a couple of levels. Never mind the prostitution angle, do you suppose his initials are TJ Hooker? Call him up and do a Shatner impression over the phone, and see how annoyed he gets.



ideasculptor
07.17.08 - 3:46 pm

reply


ask him if his sidekick's name is Adrian Zmed!


funny story... well maybe more pathetic than funny....

when I was a kid my first exposure to William Shatner was not via Star Trek but as TJ Hooker. It's still foreign to me to see shatner playing the role of captain of the enterprise. to me he will always be TJ Hooker!



Roadblock
07.17.08 - 3:51 pm

reply


This thread is now officially highjacked & will now be known as the William Shatner thread.

A few years ago we sat a couple of rows behind Shatner at the REDCAT during a production of the one man MacBeth by Stephen Dillane. He seemed to enjoy the show.



mr rollers
07.17.08 - 4:12 pm

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I had a desk for two years outside of his office at Universal.

The guy is a real nut job.



Joe Borfo
07.17.08 - 4:19 pm

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Shatner playing Officer Collier...

"you...................are not...a...car.........."



dannyzuko
07.17.08 - 4:22 pm

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Make that.....

Sheriff. Officer TJ Hooker!!!!



bentstrider
07.17.08 - 4:25 pm

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"...illogical."


[dude can't even make the Wolfpack sign correctly]



two wheels good
07.17.08 - 4:38 pm

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Maybe I'm not a car but ... I can be a tractor.



marino
07.17.08 - 4:58 pm

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HONK! HONK!



eddieboyinla
07.17.08 - 5:09 pm

reply


Spock is a natural for Wolfpack Hustle c'mon!



Roadblock
07.17.08 - 5:14 pm

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LAUGH OUT LOUD!!!!!



soso
07.17.08 - 5:16 pm

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That Spock pic is high-larious!

This thread will now be known as "the old TV thread". Star Trek was probably the second show I ever saw on a color TV. Batman was the first. I had to go to my friend's house to watch it 'cause we only had a b&w set.



mr rollers
07.17.08 - 5:57 pm

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Funny. A dude in my office was once told by El Segundo PD over loudspeaker, in what he described as Traffic Cop Haiku, that "YOU. ARE LIKE. A CAR. YOU MUST. ACT. LIKE A CAR." ... when he did what you guys were told to do. Sounds like ESPD has LBPD licked.

I bet LBPD would really like to hear that they've been licked by ESPD. Or anyone. Uptight, wrong-headed assholes.



katiepoche
07.17.08 - 6:03 pm

reply


I was part of the group that was pulled over by the friendly LBPD officers. I am so happy to say that they took the time to put on their disco lights, amplified their voices over the loud speaker and requested us to pull over from the #1 lane to the far right hand side of the street, just to provide clarity in my life. Thank you, LBPD for FINALLY letting me know that I AM NOT A CAR. I truly appreciate you taking the time to educate me about this, rather than wasting your time on those who are committing other minor criminal acts such as murder, rape, robbery, or burglary. I feel so much safer riding through the streets of the LBC knowing that you are behind me, ensuring that I am crossing the streets as safely as possible.

Thank you Long Beach Police Department.

I AM NOT A CAR.



katerpillar
07.17.08 - 7:10 pm

reply


That's the fucking problem with some fucking idiot cops. they brush up on all the cvc codes that pertain to cars and car-driver behaviour that they are in complete ignorance of what our fucking rights on the road are... not that far off as motored vehicles. we can pretty much do just about everything a car can in traffic including turning left at the left lane. I hate dumb ass ignorant cops like this idiot.





Eddie GOpez
07.17.08 - 11:38 pm

reply



If you would like a "you are not a car" t-shirt
reply with size and I'll make sure we have enough,

$6 ea



dannyzuko
07.18.08 - 4:34 pm

reply


Probably wouldn't be smart to respond with....
"Well, you're no car either, in fact, that SUV qualifies as a tank right there. Are you properly trained and have the correct endorsements to operate that piece of machinery?
Has this piece of equipment been inspected by Commercial Vehicle Enforcement?
Where are your IFTA stickers?
Has your CAB card been validated?
Pull into the barn driv.......whack!!"

On a side-note, I've always heard of the case of their being a long-standing rivalry between local PD/sheriff's dept's, and highway patrol.
Kind of reminds me of that movie, Super Troopers.



bentstrider
07.18.08 - 4:44 pm

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Reply here? Yes, 2 large ones, please = $12.



mr rollers
07.18.08 - 4:47 pm

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DO THE ROBOT!!!



meandmybluebike
07.18.08 - 4:51 pm

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t shirt orders here?

definitely 2 for me as well.

I love the title of this thread!

it reminds me of how once whilst riding my bicycle in Boston during grad school days, a lady in her car, with children in the back, pulled up along side me, rolled down her window and yelled,

"YOU ARE NOT A CAR!!!!!"

and the proceeded to speed off!

weee!!!


*GASP*



ingipet
07.18.08 - 4:53 pm

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@ingipet

Well, in the case of a non-LEO, they're fair game.




bentstrider
07.18.08 - 5:00 pm

reply


don't forget the size, tnx



dannyzuko
07.18.08 - 5:05 pm

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1 medium, 1 large please

:) thank you danny!





ingipet
07.18.08 - 5:07 pm

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i'll take a large.... just let me know how much.



July
07.18.08 - 7:03 pm

reply


$6 make you holla



dannyzuko
07.18.08 - 7:06 pm

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swwwweeeeeettt.



July
07.18.08 - 7:54 pm

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@danny

i feel for you so many times i have been bitched at riding though eldo on the car lanes and had cops say "your not a car you have to take the side walk or walk you bike.. daayum son so much drama in the lbc...






theshues
07.18.08 - 8:05 pm

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yes. you have my $6 mangos! but make it say this:


IM AM NOT A CAR
but i can do the same thing you can on the streets!
C.V.C. 21202



Eddie GOpez
07.18.08 - 8:25 pm

reply


...or the various C.V.C. 2120.. that apply!



Eddie GOpez
07.18.08 - 8:26 pm

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size medium. yellow w/ black print if possible. or BLACK w/ white print!





Eddie GOpez
07.18.08 - 8:27 pm

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i'll be at crank mob tomorrow. can you make it large, dodger blue with white lettering???



July
07.18.08 - 8:31 pm

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i'll be at crank mob and if you've got a medium, I want it



Undercover Bob
07.19.08 - 4:23 am

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I'm guessing that different color schemes aren't part of the deal here, not for $6. Your choices, and again I'm guessing, are 1.) shirt, or 2.) no shirt.

dannyzuko, I would like one (1) shirt, the smallest you can find.





katiepoche
07.19.08 - 5:33 am

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I can haz one shirt small or medium? I don't know how big these shirts are, so I'm just gonna say something close to a youth large.
Gracias :)



imachynna
07.19.08 - 9:20 am

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I'll be making spoke cards or copies or some type of palpable object that we can hand out with this on it:

Driver's Handbook 2008

Page 40; Bicycles



imachynna
07.19.08 - 9:24 am

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Post if you'd like one so I have an estimate of how many to make



imachynna
07.19.08 - 9:25 am

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I sure as hell am NOT a car either..

Please mark me down for a t-shirt, size large.

And THANKS.



adamthelizard
07.19.08 - 9:46 am

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Bicycles
Bicyclists on public streets have the same rights and responsibilities as automobile drivers. Respect the right-of-way of bicyclists because they are entitled to share the road
with other drivers. Here are some
critical points for drivers and cyclists
to remember:
• Drivers must:
-look carefully for bicyclists before opening doors next to moving traffic or before turning
right.
-safely merge toward the curb or into the bike lane.
- not overtake a bicyclist just before making a right turn. Merge first, then turn.
• Bicyclists:
-are lawfully permitted to ride on certain sections of freeways. Be careful when approaching or passing a bicyclist on a freeway.
-must ride in the same direction as other traffic, not against it.
- must ride in a straight line as near to the right curb or edge of
the roadway as practical—not
on the sidewalk.
-must make left and right turns in the same way that drivers do, using the same turn lanes.
-may legally move left to turn left, to pass a parked or moving vehicle, another bicycle,
an animal, or to make
Turns for bicyclists
Intersections with special lanes
a turn, avoid debris, or other
hazards.
-may choose to ride near the left curb or edge of a one-way street.
-may use a left turn lane. If the bicyclist
is traveling straight ahead, he or she should use a through traffic lane rather than ride next to the curb and block traffic making right turns.
-are lawfully permitted to ride on certain sections of freeways, in some rural areas where there is no alternate route. Be careful when approaching or passinga bicyclist on a freeway.



Joe Borfo
07.19.08 - 4:26 pm

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this is clearly an existential dilemma. I think that cop thinks he is a car.





trickmilla
07.19.08 - 8:23 pm

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"I think we need to make some spoke cards with the cvc on it."



lackflag
07.20.08 - 2:50 am

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sorry, I've lagged a bit, but I've got the "you are not a car t-shirts"

let me know how to get them to you of you wanted one,

emaildannyzuko@gmail.com



dannyzuko
09.18.08 - 3:26 pm

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WANT!



Joe Borfo
09.18.08 - 3:32 pm

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bump



imachynna
09.18.08 - 7:18 pm

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This is the same officer that gave me the Commercial Vehicle ticket!!!

Oh well, I've already got proof my medical card's valid.

I just got to get a Level-I inspection from the CHP's Commercial Vehicle Enforcement and, BAM!!!

Siteration recktified.



bentstrider
09.19.08 - 4:15 am

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are they heavy beefy t's or better quality?
i just hate heavy shirts



aksendz
09.19.08 - 10:41 am

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the shirts are Hanes Heavyweight...

Zuko - thanks again for getting the shirts made! I'll be sportin mine at tonight's pirate ride! ARRR!!! I hopes to get me some booty! lol



katerpillar
09.19.08 - 11:02 am

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i actually am a car



steph
09.19.08 - 4:51 pm

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i like bykes



Joe Borfo
09.19.08 - 4:55 pm

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