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Thread started by Alex Thompson at 03.5.09 - 4:59 pm
WHOA - I found this in the Associated Press feed - did y'all see this?
Two titans of the LA bike scene stand poised to square off in a match race of decidedly humble proportions. Or one Titan anyway.
"Yeah, it all happened over Facebook statuses" says Alex Thompson, aka A-HULK. "You'd be surprised how easy it is to bait iJunes with a well written Facebook status". Alex Thompson's status read "Alex has the solution for all you 'fast' bikers: skinny runner legs".
The West LA bike activist returned to over 13 status notifications, mostly from iJunes. "He really flipped out, I mean I meant to get his attention, but I was surprised." The valley rider wrote that "I have humongo guads (sic), and i can outpace most people", and that "you need fat in your legs to keep your joints lubricated." iJunes, aka teh MOUF, could not be reached for comment.
"I guess he wants me to know that his legs are fat", says Alex Thompson. "I already knew that" he adds. A-Hulks next status update reads "Alex can out climb Junu "iJunes" Kang anytime, and will prove it up Beverly Glen, non-Valley side. Match race, youngster smack down. "
Purportedly, iJunes would prefer a Topanga Canyon climb. The Topanga Climb is 9.27 miles, while the Beverly Glen climb is only 3.67 miles. A-Hulk, who competed over 8000meters in college cross country, and 800 meters during track season, derides the switch.
A-HULK says that's classic MOUF behavior. "He's always got something to add." A-HULK goes on, "I used to race all out for 2 minutes, and then dry heave for 15 minutes. I don't need to ride 10 miles to prove I'm better than the MOUF." When asked how long he needs, A-HULK responded "I need about 5 minutes to settle the issue forever."
Will the match race happen? Who will be humiliated? This reporter doesn't know, but you can be sure he'll be there if it does happen.
Can we add a Yo Momma Contest to the end of this? Then a Potato Sack Race! Then a Log-Toss! Then a Egg-Eating Contest (Hard-boiled)! Then a DrinkAndDraw Showdown! Then a FinalCutPro Edit-Off! Then Big Bank Take Little Bank! Then a Speed-Essay Contest! Then a Milk-Drinkathon! Then a Price-Is-Right! Then a Kissing Booth! With a pony ring! And free ice cream with toppings! Can we get Dan Deacon to play a show and DJ the afterparty? Please! And bicycles everywhere! Animals! Then we'll call Banksy to do an installation that teaches us something and offends us and makes us laugh all at the same time! With a dolphin tank! Stingrays to pet! We'll get the Yaysayers Bus to take us to Mexico to sing Happy Birthday to Dingo and then we can stop in Vegas and New York on the way back and I have some friends there that can throw us a party! Race! Race! Race!
"I guess he wants me to know that his legs are fat", says Alex Thompson. "I already knew that" made me laugh out loud
i don't think leg size [+fat/muscle or -fat/muscle] makes one person better than another at biking and running, there are a lot of other factors involved to better run and bike. All our muscles develop differently and we become accustom to their size. we've never been in another persons body to really know if it's easier or harder to carry more muscle mass. people of all shapes and sizes have been winning bike and running races since the begging of time.
we'll still have to see who wins THIS race though, because it's the most important one- to me. do you feel any pressure? i hope you do
IM THERE WHERE U AT B-RAD O U JUS NOT RESPONDIN CUZ YOUR BUSY BEING INFERIOR TO ME BITCH YR ALL SAD BC U SUCK AT LIFE AND BIKES I WIN IM ON AN ADRENALINE RUSH BC I AM SUPERIOR WINNING IS EASY FOR ME IM HIGH BRAD CAN I BORROW YOUR TRUCK SUNDAY
YES, stay turned on, form a grudge, and race them, SAME DAY, SAME PLACE, SAME RACE!
I will be wearing spandex, full AT kit, wif owt socks so that skinny runner legs are displayed. iJunes, your attire for your ass beating? Ass less chaps perchance?
This is a personal grudge that needs time to rot and seethe. It's also motivator to keep iJunes training and for me to eat more celery and less ice cream (wich ur icekween self!)
Duderina, who's your grudge? Nancy Wang aka nancine? I heard she's waaay faster than you? I heard it from her! She said something like "fuck the Cohen brothers, and their fans, especially the slow Wolf-philes."
id really like to see an event of this. we can have a pre-race ride to the end point at mulholland, where we will eat ice cream and wait for the winner to arrive victorious.
and then there is, of course: the rematch series....
there is no grudge. AT called me out, i accept. his course. no more about this before i get chewed out for talking out of my ass cause its what i like to do.
if you want to watch you better me there M~F everyday until AT shows up or makes his announcement for when he will show.
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
it all happened over Facebook statuses
this is a 1 on 1 settlement issue. no need to drag everybody into this and make the both of us look like asses since nobody on the internet can calm the fuck down.
first it was april 11, and then upon going over my schedule, i have a race early next morning. i asked AT for a date change, and he started calling me out for date dodging.
and i wont have that. so i laid down my ultimatum because in this world, not everything will go your way. im over the hype now, its just disgusting, if you want me, you can have me, but showing up is half the battle.
everyday mon-fri until april 17. 6:30-6:40.
thats it nothing else is to be said. done and all these threads should sink.
nope. he can have me anyday. but im not gonna bend over and let AT have it his way when i have other stuff to do. he doesnt want to change the date so fuck it. ANYDAY is the date. he has whole 30 days to train or whatever and show up.
yeah so AT who can't make it to the 30 days i proposed, versus me the few weekends i can't make it, makes me the one to back out. i'll take 30 people in 30 days if thats your problem.
Fuck you Sara bond. Fuck you johnnyboy. Fuck you alex. I'm going to be supporting ijunes at his race while you can go fuck yourselves. You are full of shit not to think your unimportant ass is going to compromise the great ijunes before a REAL race. How about YOU don't back down and take up ijunes on his offer. You picked that place you can at least let ijunes pick a REASONABLE TIME.
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