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----------------------------------- GROSS ANGELOPES -----------------------------------
12.5.09
As the world turns, so does Los Angelopes.We turn our heads and cough. Now, some of us are mammals; others are marsupials; most of us, aliens. So that means we CAN drink a gallon of milk in one hour. Don't believe me?! Me neither! But that's why we'll both be this historic occasion...
Yes,
GRƟŞS $ѦƝƉǤƎḸʘⱣ€Ş!
1ST EVER PUKE CHALLENGE FREAKBIKE RIDE!
SATURDAY DECEMBER 5TH
MEAT @ 12 NOON @ VENICE PIER
This is an experiment. Follow me.
1 - You ride a (freak) bike. I'll ride my 4-seater rickshaw pedicab.
2 - We'll ride the westside offering free rides on the rickshaw.
3 - While the peds are getting a "free" ride, I talk them into tipping us for our...
4 - FIRST EVER RICKSHAW MILK GALLON CHALLENGE! Keep following me.
Once we have collected enough "tips" for them, we'll buy 4 gallons of milk. Four contestants from our ride will ride on the back of my rickshaw while attempting to drink the entire gallon in one hour WITHOUT PUKING. (Click here to read the rules.) I can't do it! Yes you can! No way! Of course you can, its only one gallon! ...Is he gonnaAAARRGAAAAARRGHgggoooughaaaaaughaughuuuughrawrrruuugghhh!
THIS IS A LEVEL 3 RIDE. We always encourage freak bikes, but this is an open event. We want everyone there to yell at the contestants while they're puking like this - "GAAAAAKAKAKA". I highly encourage building a freak bike for this ride, so get on the forums and squak it up. You will likely find help. We love you. We know you. We are you. We know how weird you are. You don't belong on regular rides. You need this. Let it out. You can't join a cult if you're already a member. Ooooooooooooo0o00oooo00o000OO!OooO!!OO1O!o!!!!!!!11!!!!
But seriously folks, we've had a lot of fun in this post, but there's one matter I'd like to seriously talk to you about. The Los Angelopes rides are freak-bike oriented and some are not as fast as your stolen fixie queer. Therefore, the slowest bike leads. If you speed faster than the slowest bike on a Los Angelopes rides, I will slash your tires. I have morals, but not on Los Angelopes rides. I told my mom that I do this and she thought I should slash your tires too. I'm invincible. Slow down.
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