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AT vs. iJUNES the EPIC RACE of EPIC RIVALS!

04.11.09

START TIME: 9AM

Beverly Glen and Sunset Blvd.

FINISH: Mullhulland and Beverly Glen

RACE FOR BRAGGING RIGHTS!

"It all started over a Facebook status"

This match of rivals was recently covered in the AP:

Two titans of the LA bike scene stand poised to square off in a match race of decidedly humble proportions. Or one Titan anyway.

"Yeah, it all happened over Facebook statuses" says Alex Thompson, aka A-HULK. "You'd be surprised how easy it is to bait iJunes with a well written Facebook status". Alex Thompson's status read "Alex has the solution for all you 'fast' bikers: skinny runner legs".

The West LA bike activist returned to over 13 status notifications, mostly from iJunes. "He really flipped out, I mean I meant to get his attention, but I was surprised." The valley rider wrote that "I have humongo guads (sic), and i can outpace most people", and that "you need fat in your legs to keep your joints lubricated." iJunes, aka teh MOUF, could not be reached for comment.

"I guess he wants me to know that his legs are fat", says Alex Thompson. "I already knew that" he adds. A-Hulks next status update reads "Alex can out climb Junu "iJunes" Kang anytime, and will prove it up Beverly Glen, non-Valley side. Match race, youngster smack down. "

Purportedly, iJunes would prefer a Topanga Canyon climb. The Topanga Climb is 9.27 miles, while the Beverly Glen climb is only 3.67 miles. A-Hulk, who competed over 8000meters in college cross country, and 800 meters during track season, derides the switch.

A-HULK says that's classic MOUF behavior. "He's always got something to add." A-HULK goes on, "I used to race all out for 2 minutes, and then dry heave for 15 minutes. I don't need to ride 10 miles to prove I'm better than the MOUF." When asked how long he needs, A-HULK responded "I need about 5 minutes to settle the issue forever."

Will the match race happen? Who will be humiliated? This reporter doesn't know, but you can be sure he'll be there if it does happen.

Clark Kent

Posted by Satan on a Tricycle

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