HIPSTER JOKES
Thread started by
DIRTY HIPSTER at 07.6.13 - 1:56 pm
PALUCHA AND OSNAP WALK INTO A BATHROOM TOGETHER, AFTER THEY EACH USE THE RESTROOM, OSNAP GOES TO LEAVE. PALUCHA SAYS, "HEY BRO, YOU GONNA WASH YOUR HANDS?" OSNAP SAYS, "YOU MUST NOT KNOW ABOUT ME, BUT IN THE 818, WE'RE TAUGHT NOT TO PISS ON OUR HANDS, BASIC BIOTCH!!!"
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A hipster walks into a bar and looks around to see if anyone noticed him come in but they didn't because they were all too busy looking at themselves.
rev10607.6.13 - 9:00 pm
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don't make jokes about German sausage...they're the wurst.
jonnypacific07.7.13 - 8:43 pm
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So Palucha, Osnap, and Dirty Hipster walk down Sunset and they meet Jesus Christ. As they all doubted his claim to be the son of God, Jesus was willing to heal each of their most serious bodily afflictions to prove them so. Jesus walks over to Osnap and kneels to touch his foot and heals his bad left ankle instantly. Jesus then walks over to Palucha and touches his stomach to heal his constant diarrhea, for Palucha was always full of shit. He is healed! As Jesus approaches Dirty Hipster and reaches to touch his problematic shoulder, Dirty Hipsters yells "Don't fucking get near me motherfucker! I am on disability!"
Hippy Sippy07.8.13 - 12:18 pm
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How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?
Three.
One to talk about doing it. But not do it.
One to make a blog or facebook post about it.
And one to get someone else to fix the light in trade for some "art".
rev106 responding to a
comment by Hippy Sippy
07.9.13 - 8:47 am
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AN ECHO PARK HIPSTER, A SILVER LAKE HIPSTER, AND A SAN FRANCISCO HIPSTER WALK INTO A BAR. THE BARTENDER SAYS, "GET THE FUCK OUT!"
DIRTY HIPSTER07.9.13 - 1:23 pm
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A hipster returns from an art show and shows his room mate the pictures he took with his I phone. "Every picture is just of your face, you just took a dozen self-portraits." The room mate said. To this the hipster replied; "Well, like yeah, I mean I was like there and all."
rev106 responding to a
comment by DIRTY HIPSTER
07.10.13 - 7:56 am
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I over heard some guys in a truck with the windows rolled at 3am grumbling "hipster" , presumably about me, since we were the only people on the road.
I'm over 40, unfashionable, and ride a fixie with a basket and a rack.
If I can be mistaken as a
hipster, that word has no meaning.
trickmilla07.10.13 - 1:23 pm
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The fixie is the bike of choice of the hipster, or was. Also being out at 3 am is suspect, I'd say you have +2 hipster points right off the bat.
rev106 responding to a
comment by trickmilla
07.10.13 - 6:33 pm
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Saying you're unfashionable +1 hipster point.
Saying that the word hipster has no meaning: + 1 hipster point.
4 already.....
????
rev10607.10.13 - 6:36 pm
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Yup. Happens all the time, sometimes even to me.
A hipster and his hipster girlfriend go to the movies. As the movies is about to start, the hipster stands up, looks around the crowded theater, and loudly tells his hipster girlfriend "Hey, this movie is too trendy since there is not one empty seat". She says "Yeah, lets get out of there".
They get out of the theater and decide to ride to the nearest hipster bar. When they get there, they find it packed full of hipsters, and all they talk about is how trendy everything is and how cool it is not to care. The end.
Hippy Sippy responding to a
comment by trickmilla
07.10.13 - 6:37 pm
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A hipster bursts into a room full of his hipster friends with an excited look on his face (for a hipster that is.) "I just found the most amazing thing!" said the hipster. The rest of his friends could barely look up from their Smart Phones to see what he was holding in his hand. "What...?" One of his friends finally groaned out from a session of furious texting. "Dude, it's like this thing you can like put music on and then after a while it wears out and like you can't hear it like play anymore!" "So...?" said another hipster. "So you like can make like an obscure mix of like songs and then it will like be gone never to like be made again!" The room fell silent, they all looked at the first hipster. "Obscure and temporary!" said the fist Hipster smugly. "What is it called?" The rest of the room asked? "A tape cassette."
rev10607.11.13 - 10:16 am
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YOU GUYS TRYING TO BE AS HIPSTER AS I AM, THAT'S THE WHOLE JOKE.
DIRTY HIPSTER08.18.13 - 2:24 am
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A hipster can't come up with no jokes because he's too busy thinking only about himself.
rev106 responding to a
comment by DIRTY HIPSTER
08.18.13 - 11:10 pm
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How do you drown a hipster? Throw him into the mainstream.
Hippy Sippy10.3.13 - 2:25 pm
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heyhipsterloserface i was doing some light reading this morning and figured you could use something to do since your trolling days are over.
read this!!!
Concern troll
A concern troll is a false flag pseudonym created by a user whose actual point of view is opposed to the one that the user claims to hold. The concern troll posts in Web forums devoted to its declared point of view and attempts to sway the group's actions or opinions while claiming to share their goals, but with professed "concerns". The goal is to sow fear, uncertainty and doubt within the group.[36]
An example of this occurred in 2006 when Tad Furtado, a staffer for then-Congressman Charles Bass (R-NH), was caught posing as a "concerned" supporter of Bass' opponent, Democrat Paul Hodes, on several liberal New Hampshire blogs, using the pseudonyms "IndieNH" or "IndyNH". "IndyNH" expressed concern that Democrats might just be wasting their time or money on Hodes, because Bass was unbeatable.[37][38] Hodes eventually won the election.
Although the term "concern troll" originated in discussions of online behavior, it now sees increasing use to describe similar behaviors that take place offline. For example, James Wolcott of Vanity Fair accused a conservative New York Daily News columnist of "concern troll" behavior in his efforts to downplay the Mark Foley scandal. Wolcott links what he calls concern trolls to what Saul Alinsky calls "Do-Nothings", giving a long quote from Alinsky on the Do-Nothings' method and effects:
“ These Do-Nothings profess a commitment to social change for ideals of justice, equality, and opportunity, and then abstain from and discourage all effective action for change. They are known by their brand, 'I agree with your ends but not your means'.[39] ”
The Hill published an op-ed piece by Markos Moulitsas of the liberal blog Daily Kos titled "Dems: Ignore 'Concern Trolls'". The concern trolls in question were not Internet participants; they were Republicans offering public advice and warnings to the Democrats. The author defines "concern trolling" as "offering a poisoned apple in the form of advice to political opponents that, if taken, would harm the recipient".[40]
brittany10.12.13 - 9:25 am
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actually yeah I was thinking that is more appropriate but I keep my enemies precise.
choose your battles and win the war.
LIKE YOU, DICKHEAD. STFU. DON'T ACT LIKE YOU HAVE ANYTHING SUBSTANTIAL IN YOUR BRAIN, TROLL. GO DRINK A PASBT AND CRY TO TRENWAY ABOUT HOW COOL YOU ARE FOR MAKING GIRLS CRY ON THE INTERNET. MAYBE THEN YOU WILL FEEL LESS BAD ABOUT PROBABLY BEING OLD NEWS, PRIME DAYZ OVARRRR, NO ONE KNOWS YOU YOU ARE IN THE BIKE SCENE, YOU'RE IRRELEVANT, TROLLING IS DEAD.
TEARRRRRRRR. SOMEONE CALL THE WAHMBULANCE FOR SLEEPYDICK OVER HERE.
XOXO
seriously idk where this shit comes from. I get where you guys are coming from with the crazy accusations....caring is just a diff story. <3
brittany responding to a
comment by sleepy
10.12.13 - 2:50 pm
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DON'T GO KILL YOURSELF NOW. I WAS JUST KIDDING. MOSTLY. MAYBE. IF THE COPS ASK WHY YOU KILLED YOURSELF, I WAS TOTALLY KIDDING.
you don't listen to cage kennylz huh :(((
i wanted to ask coldcut if he likes copywrite but i don't think he wants to be friennnndddssss. will you ask him for me?
brittany responding to a
comment by sleepy
10.12.13 - 2:52 pm
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Who's Trenway?
And sorry if I made you cry.
sleepy responding to a
comment by brittany
10.12.13 - 9:58 pm
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Because the people of Trenway never turn out to be online internet bullies, sometimes anonymously.
You're right, totally out of line. I should let poor Trenway out of this.
I still think any grown man with a family and life who spends time on this forum is an idiot so, touche.
xoxo
brittany responding to a
comment by Joe Borfo
10.13.13 - 12:55 pm
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Oh i get it, you're sad I'm ending the reign of bullying on the forums from anonymous cool kids.
Yeah i'd be sad too.
It's ok, here's a tissue.
"Brittany, go make changes"
"OK!!!!"
Be careful about the advice you give to people. ;/
:D :D :D
brittany responding to a
comment by Joe Borfo
10.13.13 - 12:56 pm
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How many hipsters does it take to ruin Midnight Ridazz?
I'd tell you but it's too obscure.
rev106 responding to a
comment by brittany
10.13.13 - 6:02 pm
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Ridazz Roulette!
