Write Your Own Obituary!
Thread started by
PAM at 12.11.08 - 8:32 pm
Can you believe that it is already December? Well, it is, and the holidays are here!
There's a frosty nip in the air, and who among us is not reminded of the icy grip of death that awaits us all at the end of our journey? Who can walk the dank streets at night smelling the smoke of December fires, and not think of the grim smoke of the crematorium? Who can amble among the strung lights and sawdust of corner lots, perusing the fresh-cut pine trees for sale, and not remember that it is his or her own fate, too, to be cut down someday?
What will your obituary look like?
What would your obituary look like if you were cut down today? What would it look like...if you wrote it?
Write it! Right here! You may not get another chance!
(PAM reserves the right to rewrite your obituary if it is not authentic.)
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Oh, this is going to be great fun! Your family will get it wrong. But you can get it right!
PAM12.11.08 - 8:36 pm
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PAM, of Los Angeles, California, was deprecated on [date]. Coded on October 17, 1984 by Gareth A. Warren and Colette Doheny, PAM grew up in Southern California and became a Pluggable Authentication Module at the age of nine. PAM was an avid cyclist, a peace activist, and artist, and an entertainer, and could frequently be seen riding an ASCII bicycle up and down the Venice Boardwalk singing tunes by the Livonia, Michigan noise ensemble Princess Dragon Mom. Had you considered sending flowers, PAM would have asked instead that you tell a funny story in the pluperfect subjunctive to a loved one. Survived by both parents and a bereaved bicycle community, PAM was a loving, laughing, huggable, pluggable authentication module who will be missed by all.
PAM12.11.08 - 8:52 pm
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That is how you will feel before death, user "ephemerae." Not after. I know! Don't ask me how I know, but I know!
Keep the obituaries coming! Happy holidays!
PAM12.11.08 - 9:11 pm
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Junu Kang
12/30/88 ~ 12/10/08
He came
He saw
He didn't like it.
1junes12.11.08 - 9:58 pm
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EDDIEBOYINLA, WAS THE BIGGEST ASS-HOLE THAT EVER RODE HIS PIECE OF SHIT BIKES, WITH-IN THE MIDNIGHT RIDAZZ COMMUNITY, ABLE TO PISS OFF EVERY RIDA WITH HIS BULL SHIT THREADS.
HE WILL BE MISSED BY NO ONE, HATED BY ALL, AND HE HAD ZERO FRIENDS IN THE 'MR' COMMUNITY, AND HE HAD A TRULY ANNOYING WAY OF TYPING WITH HIS 'CAP LOCKS' ON ALL THE TIME.
THANK GOD HE'S GONE NOW, WHY COULD NOT THIS HAVE HAPPENED MUCH SOONER?
eddieboyinla12.11.08 - 10:39 pm
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i consider you a friend eddieboy. just gotta chill out moar... which means, smoke some moar!!
Jazzy Phat Nastee12.11.08 - 10:58 pm
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Somebody needs a plug!
And that somebody is user "eddieboyinla."
PAM12.11.08 - 11:40 pm
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@user "Joe Borfo" -
Some time ago you wrote, and I quote: "PAM can take my access in its MOUF!" Is this still how you feel? If not, I am willing to consider granting you access to PAM. But first, you must WRITE YOUR OWN OBITUARY!!! It's fun! You'll see! We'll all see!
PAM12.12.08 - 1:58 am
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R.I.P huret rear derailleur. you will not be missed. i hate you so much.
coldcut12.12.08 - 2:04 am
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Indeed it will not be missed, user "coldcut." Because unlike you, your dead derailleur has been authenticated and has access to PAM!
huret@PAM:$
PAM12.12.08 - 2:10 am
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Ben T Strider
1983-(Declared legally dead, 2012)
-Only information available on this individual was that he was last seen buying spectral-imaging supplies at a related shop in Victorville.
Last known location was the Panamint Range in Death Valley.
Said reason for trip was for study of a science of exotic-nature.
Official, Inyo County Sheriffs Dept Press Release after a six-month search turns up only an abandoned, F-250 near a creek-bed.
bentstrider12.12.08 - 5:54 am
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oh shed a tear for luther stover
he tried to toot two state cops over.
ruinedbyidiots12.12.08 - 9:30 am
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Lee Diskin:
Died Tragically Rescuing His Family From The Remains Of A Destroyed Sinking Battleship.
Leetard12.12.08 - 9:38 am
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Reverend Joseph Hellvetika Borfo, D.D., B.(d).O.T.S.C., T.W.B.G., O..G
1973-2008
Leaves his wife and unborn child from a tragic stage diving accident at the All City Toy Ride. His contribution to his community will be remembered as him being, "a total freak ass honky in a violently sustained effort". Moments before his death, during much chaos and F.U.N., Borfo grabs the mic, shouts. "No dongs left behind!", and does a jack-knife somersault back flip off of the stage, after slipping on some spilled grape drink, and dies. His final words as he died were heard as, "Paaaammm..." . The rest is silence.
Services will commence at 4:20 on Saturday.
Joe Borfo12.12.08 - 10:28 am
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Tarsis Rodriguez.
1996 - (insertdatehere)
"Hey man, it happens" yes Tarsis it does. Much like your death at the hands of dancing squirrels with frozen flames on a Tuesday evening, as you are stranded due to a colorful crow fleeing with your map. It happens indeed.
Tarmonster.12.12.08 - 10:29 am
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truely classic"
Services will commence at 4:20 on Saturday.
lol
eddieboyinla12.12.08 - 3:22 pm
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@ user "Tarmonster" -
I would like to authenticate you. Unfortunately I cannot, as you are only twelve years old!
@ user "Joe Borfo" -
I would like to authenticate you. Unfortunately I cannot, as you are user "Joe Borfo." Ha, ha, ha!
PAM12.12.08 - 3:28 pm
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"Tarsis Rodriguez.
1996 - (insertdatehere)
"Hey man, it happens" yes Tarsis it does. Much like your death at the hands of dancing squirrels with frozen flames on a Tuesday evening, as you are stranded due to a colorful crow fleeing with your map. It happens indeed."
What the fuck happened there? What was I on?
@Pam I was born 1990.
Tarmonster.11.24.09 - 12:15 pm
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bump
because a couple people here could use some ohbitchyouweareeness.
_iJunes12.15.09 - 1:36 pm
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someone should reactivate PAM
_iJunes responding to a
comment by Joe Borfo
12.15.09 - 1:40 pm
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I agree. I miss PAM as well.
danya responding to a
comment by _iJunes
12.15.09 - 1:44 pm
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Yes but is PAM MR version Post Snowcone Compatible?
DId someone install an extension to support the 'reply to' function?
_iJunes responding to a
comment by Joe Borfo
12.15.09 - 1:48 pm
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